I am unwell. I have succumbed to that occupational hazard of the modern educational professional, depression, and been sent home on sick leave. Gradually, I am beginning to recognise the warning signs I dismissed or denied at the time. My inability to keep track of keys, ID cards, etc. My moments of disassociation. Saturdays spent entirely either in bed or wishing I was there. Friendships neglected. Weight creeping upwards due to snatched meals.

So here we are. I have no idea when, or even if, I shall return to work. At the moment I would rather jump in front of a tram. I am getting help. I am finding it very hard to get off the sofa and do anything at all, but hopefully that will pass in good time. It’s early days yet.

I feel that one or two people at work have not helped the situation, though the vast majority have been kind and supportive. And the couple that have not, I feel that they are basically decent souls who are being forced by the shameful underfunding of education to make decisions that they would rather not have to make, and would even less rather discuss with me. I have had a gratifying amount of support from parents, children and staff – but none of that means that I am immune from becoming a luxury that my employer can no longer afford.

I have held the line for as long as I could. The cost in terms of my quality of life has been significant. I am blessed by a supportive family and community, and if the worst came to the worst we could manage without the money I make. Many are not so fortunate, and my heart truly bleeds for anyone who has to force themselves back to work in the kind of state I am in at the moment.

Meanwhile, I am beginning to come across some public acknowledgement of the number of teachers going through this kind of thing, and I suspect it is the tip of an iceberg. If anyone knows of any burnt-out and despairing school librarians who are happy to talk, please get in touch. Because the worst possible thing I could do right now is try and get through this alone.

 

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Wimpy Kids or British values – the great school library money grab

 

“it’s just simpler to buy your own than fight for basics”.

The recently reported survey results that teachers are increasingly paying for school resources out of their own pockets comes as no surprise to me. It’s not simply a matter of funds not being there. As one respondent points out,  “it’s just simpler to buy your own than fight for basics”.

Schools have discovered that one way to save money is to make it so exhausting and frustrating for teachers to get hold of the basic materials they need that many of them will just pick them up on the way home. Of course, that’s by far the most expensive course, but nobody said the teachers had to do it did they? If the teachers can’t be arsed to go through the right channels, then that’s their problem.

I can’t believe this hasn’t spread to what is left of school libraries. I’m already seeing its depressing, and entirely deniable, fallout. It’ll soon be time for the new Tom Gates and Wimpy Kid books. Last year I picked them up at rock bottom prices from the supermarket, which meant I could afford three copies, no small matter when you have a waiting list of 20 or more. Last year, when a teacher asked me for a book, I could order it when I got home on Amazon Prime and have it in her hands the following morning. And when the dinosaur craze hit Reception yet again, I could pick up five or six books at Oxfam on the way home, thus delighting not only a bunch of five year olds but a valuable charity as well. (At least that made me feel better about buying from the corporate monsters destroying independent bookshops).

Not any more. From now on, I have to put in a requisition and if we don’t have an account with that supplier, tough. Suddenly the books kids actually want to read have to compete with the school’s need for more stuff about British Values or the Ancient Romans in their classrooms. I have to find the time and the energy to make the case that kids deserve control over what they read for pleasure, and that the stuff they choose won’t always impress educational professionals.

I have been in this job for almost 20 years. I have never felt so powerless and frustrated as I do right now. And it’s not even as if this is the school’s money, at least not entirely. It was raised by the PTA, who have faithfully handed it over into my care for years, trusting me to provide the books children actually want to read. They spend hours organising fund-raising events. But they were never consulted about the school subsuming the proceeds into their own budget and, thereby, overruling their right to specify what it is used for.

I am sure the school would justify their new policy by pointing to a spate of recent high profile cases involving financial irregularities in schools. What is wrong with greater transparency? It’s like safeguarding – any new policy, no matter how batty, small-minded or illogical, is hard to question if to do so implies that you’re anti-safeguarding. Of course, I don’t want the right to make off with the proceeds of the cake sale. But for the last 20 years I have never submitted an expenses claim that didn’t include carefully collated receipts. And everyone seemed perfectly happy, particularly the children reading the books they enjoyed.

In the end, I just don’t have the bloody energy to argue in favour of Tom Gates or Minecraft books. People will probably wonder why it’s such a big deal to want the latest one when months later it will trickle down as a second-hand, well-meaning donation. The answer to that is simple – if the last release of something is just as good, why did anyone ever queue up outside a store?

So, I shall swallow hard, pay £8.99 and fill in forms galore for something I could once have got at Tesco for £5.00, and watch as my 90% pupil engagement drops week on week. I shall tell children they have to learn to wait for what they want and that it’s character building, and meanwhile have they tried The Wind In The Willows?  And eventually I’ll have had enough, and I’ll retire. I suppose I’ve had a good run.

 

The library as alternative playground

The school library can be seen as one of the only spaces in a school which is truly free — the space that is not ‘home’ or a ‘classroom’, and which can be without academic, sporting, or family expectations…….School libraries have long been a place of refuge from the playground for many students.

Kay Oddone, Scootle Lounge

When I was doing my A-levels, I did not feel at all comfortable in the rough, loud environment of the Sixth Form Common Room. Instead I turned to the library as an alternative space to relax and socialise, and made some wonderful literary discoveries and lasting friendships in the process.

Kay Oddone’s point above pinpoints a very important feature of a good school library. Our schools are highly stressful environments where kids are pushed through a frantic schedule and one-size-fits-all initiatives. I can only speak for primary schools in the UK, but I’ve seen many children who struggle socially due to introversion, special educational needs or simply the need to chill out in a relaxed and safely supervised space.

Sadly, this is something I find it increasingly difficult to provide, even though I am that vanishingly rare phenomenon, the salaried primary school librarian. Here are a few of the barriers I face:

  • PART TIME LIBRARIANS I work across three different schools, so none of them have a full-time provision. In fact children have to be discouraged or even banned from the library when I’m not around, due to the technical difficulties of them borrowing and returning books without using the right procedure. I simply don’t have time to sort out a pile of little post-it notes on my desk or search for a title a child insists they have returned. All my time goes on class sessions – sometimes up to six a day.
  • SAFEGUARDING In some ways this is the most intractable issue. It makes it impossible to employ unsupervised pupil librarians. In one school I am not allowed to open the library informally over lunchtime and breaks without a second member of staff being present at all times. I do not feel I can pull already overloaded teachers or TAs out of their much needed lunch breaks, so the doors stay closed.
  • LACK OF TIME I can only run one lunchtime club per school per week. A number of the children who would benefit and would love to come have clashes with other activities, such as swimming. It is very difficult for them to get my individual attention at any time. Schools are run like airports these days, at 100% capacity. There’s no down-time, and it’s never acceptable (for understandable reasons) for children to spend even a couple of minutes without staff knowing exactly where they are.
  • UNSUITABLE ACCOMMODATION Libraries, where they exist at all in primary schools, are often in open areas where privacy and a calm atmosphere are impossible to provide. There can be an element of wanting to impress visitors and inspectors with a beautiful library. In one case this has led to money being lavished on a lovely one in the reception area of the school, but less than 50% of the children are borrowing books. One reason for this is that there is almost always small group work or other activity going on in the library space.

I could go on, but the general picture is clear. Just having a library is not enough – there has to be a shift in the school’s culture that will accommodate a library. All these problems are ultimately based on a scarcity of resources, and one result of that is that there is no slack, no emptiness, no down time in the system any more. I cannot tie up staff to man a library unless I can guarantee children will come in and use it. I cannot insist that the lunchtime staff, who already have too much to do, go out of their way to identify children who would enjoy lunchtime in the library. Schools are incredibly regimented these days for all kinds of reasons – safeguarding, curricular demands, staffing shortages – the list goes on. And making children into confident readers takes time. All the schools I work in want me there and go out of their way to make me welcome. However, that doesn’t entirely dispel the suspicion that sometimes they don’t quite know what to do with me.

 

MLS and the Capita connection

I visited Peters Educational Booksellers at their huge warehouse in Birmingham yesterday – an absolute feast for anyone who loves to be let loose in what may well be the country’s largest children’s bookshop. I was interested and impressed to talk to them about the ways that they are increasingly taking the burden of book selection and processing off the shoulders of school staff, which can only be a good business move in these days of vanishing school librarians. They employ ten librarians who read and review every single book that comes in. I think they’re doing a great job at a reasonable price, and they’re nice, helpful people too.

I did, however, pick up one piece of information that worried me. For some time I’ve noticed a decline in the quality of service and technical support offered by Micro Librarian Systems. It’s still a good product of its type, probably the national brand leader, but they seem far more interested in flogging Reading Cloud to me, which would bump our sub up to an unaffordable £700 p.a. per site, than providing reliable day-to-day support on anything that isn’t sales-focussed.

Last year it took us literally months to import student data onto our system via SIMS, which should have been a straightforward process, and one we were paying a fee for. I also hit a brick wall when I tried to negotiate a joined-up cataloguing solution across our three school sites. I appreciate that in the case of pupil data there are safeguarding issues, so fair enough, but an integrated book catalogue would have saved us considerable amounts of time and money.

If MLS move to Reading Cloud being their default offering – something they publicly deny but which seems increasingly likely, my Trust will be faced with a formidable annual subscription of around £2K . I do not see how that can be sustainable in the current political climate.

I mentioned all this to a well-informed person in the industry who told me that Capita have recently taken over MLS, and suddenly a lot of things made sense.

Frankly, I wouldn’t want Capita anywhere near my organisation. They have a worrying record of screwing up outsourced data management contracts. Beloved by Tory state-shrinkers everywhere, their record over the last few years has included NHS IT disasters, the notorious outsourcing Barnet Council and links with ATOS. They already control the SIMS system used by many schools to manage their pupil data, and they are involved with Home Office deportations.

Some time ago it was reported that the Home Office were putting pressure on schools to inform on pupils whose parents might be illegal immigrants. Many parents refused to co-operate. If Capita are already running SIMS, whether the parents or teachers are on board is a moot point.

So information on the books borrowed by the children at the three diverse schools where I work is now directly linked to a company that helps to implement illegal and inhumane deportation policies, sometimes affecting people who have built productive lives and family relationships here lasting decades, and find themselves plonked in Singapore without a penny to their name. No doubt their “management solutions” also facilitate the decimation of public libraries in Barnet and elsewhere.

I don’t think I feel particularly comfortable with that. At the moment, short of recruiting an army of volunteers filling in index cards, I don’t see what option I have other than to continue with MLS until we decide they are unaffordable. But I can’t help hoping another serious player in school library hosting comes on the scene soon, and that hopefully they have a better track record on ethics.

Perhaps Peters could look into it.

The importance of analytical reading

We all know how important it is to read to kids, and to start young. But the way we read is important, and more subtle than we might think, argues Bill Murphy in this excellent article. They are not just passive containers for stories. They need to engage in dialogue with adults about them, and that is how they learn.

If pushed, I think most of us would agree that such close shared reading builds empathy. Kids need to be able to imagine a situation from another person’s point of view, to walk in the skin of someone unlike themselves. Incidentally, we don’t grow out of this and it’s tempting not to move out of our comfort zones, as I recently discovered when I went to see Moonlight. Realising how unmoored I felt by an all-black cast gave me new insight into the importance of diversity in children’s books – how does a four-year old black girl feel when she’s confronted with the overwhelmingly white world of Princess Poppy?

Empathy has to be good, right? Well, yes and no. How many of the people who were moved by the photograph of little Aylan Kurdi washed up dead on shore went on to vote for politicians who denied asylum to unaccompanied Syrian child refugees? Emotional intelligence is rather different. It includes analytical skills, looking at the whole picture, at evidence, possible strategies, problems and outcomes. It means asking not just, “Do you think the duck feels sad?” but also, “The fox seems nice. Do you think the duck should believe him? Why not?”

In my work in school libraries, I involve children in these conversations all the time and their perceptiveness frequently surprises me. A good story is full of fork-in-the-road moments, all of which have consequences. And picture books abound in clues that, if decoded, yield vital background information. When we read to a child, we are inviting them to decode that information and theorise about where it could be taking us. Yes, empathy is involved; we can all feel sorry for the little ladybird that doesn’t fit in because she has no spots, or the little girl desperate for a kitten who ends up taking home a gorilla from the zoo. But why doesn’t it work out to keep the gorilla as a pet? Seeing the way he trashes a suburban kitchen, and why the gorilla isn’t happy, carries highly significant life lessons.

It seems that at the moment we are confronted daily with the awful consequences of people determined to maintain a coherent ideological position in face of all reasonable evidence. Too much reliance on feelings can lead into dark places, and the idea that you only have to believe something badly enough and find others who feel likewise to construct your own perfectly valid reality. I wonder if the large numbers of young children who don’t get exposed regularly to language and conceptual development through reading are contributing to the problem.

There is far too much passive consumption of entertainment. Cinema and TV can be wonderful but the emotional beats are frequently heightened and signposted in letters a hundred feet high. Ambiguity is rare, and far too many children are watching without any accompanying person to help them interpret what they are seeing through loving, open-ended discussion. The school day is crammed and even schools with libraries struggle to fit in every class for even one story time a week. After years of austerity, the effect of neglected maintenance is becoming all to apparent in the decline of roads and the built environment around us. The neglect of our children’s inner world and analytical faculties may not show up right away, but we ignore it at our own risk.

These books are made for walking

When I became a school librarian I had lovely visions of introducing children to wonderful, life-enhancing books (I still do, as it happens). Later I modified this somewhat – to getting kids reading anything, almost, that they were prepared to read, including Minecraft manuals, comics and anthologies of the world’s 1,000 grossest fart jokes.

What I wasn’t prepared for was the sheer, gruelling amount of time I would spend trying to get overdue books back.

Almost every school library, I am sure, starts off with a strict zero-tolerance policy on overdue books. That four year old crying in the corner because every other child in the class brought back their picture book and he didn’t? Tough, he doesn’t get another one. Of course, such intentions get the corners chipped off them after the first few weeks. To do otherwise would probably be inhuman. There is always the very real risk that the child you are denying further library books to is the one in greatest need of them. So I am fairly confident that most good librarians quietly write off a proportion of their stock as unrecoverable.

Teaching staff, being busy and distracted people, are often the very ones to undermine the policies they advocate. This week I had to reschedule several classes as a colleague was unavailable to take them. In each case, despite emails and visits to remind them, either the teachers or the parents seemed baffled by the change and slightly put out that they’d been expected to return their books on a different day. So we had classes of 30 where only four children were technically allowed to have a book over half term. It begs the question of why they are coming into the library in the first place. So I caved, and allowed them a second book.

Eventually, unless you have superhuman patience, you will make it clear that you are really rather cross with a persistent non-returner. At this point one of two things might happen. If the child is smallish, and the library in an open area, they will start nervously and surreptitiously replacing books on shelves when you aren’t around. The presence of a large, expensive box marked BOOK RETURNS will do nothing to alleviate this problem. There will be an escalation of reminders over the next few weeks, culminating in tears, indignant protests from parents, and quite possibly the child’s permanent reluctance to come anywhere near the library in future.

But the alternative is perhaps even more depressing and time-consuming. It tends to happen with older kids who don’t actually like reading very much. The appeal of the library for them lies in its potential as the arena for a power struggle. The time you once imagined spending introducing Philip Pullman or Frank Cotterell Boyce to their next fans will probably go instead on repeating, ad nauseam, that you know perfectly well the book you have just been presented with by said child, claiming, “Look, Miss, it’s me book, I’m bringing it back, now can I have another one?” is the one you saw them pick up off the table two minutes ago. An outburst of indignation will follow, as it always does. Eventually they will escalate the situation by returning library books stolen from other borrowers. They will relish the thought of blameless Perfect Peters suffering from your cruel and heartless overdue notices, as just revenge for your unreasonable insistence that they return their own. Such characters are more interested in wearing you down that learning about the basics of database management.

In an ideal world, every school would have a full-time librarian and there would be time to do all the fun bits of the job as well as the administration. Or you could even have different people to do each bit. There are some people who excel at the nit-picking, plastic covering and label-sticking. They’re doing a great job. I should know, I used to be one of them myself. Sometimes I think nostalgically of those days.

Then some completely unexpected, lovely thing will happen and it will all seem worth the effort again.

 

When it all gets too much

This was the week when it very nearly all became too much. When I felt like giving up, even though I knew what a huge mistake it would be to do that. It’s not the answer. The answer is to make the job I have both productive and manageable, and to accept what a challenge that is.

On Tuesday evening, just before I went to bed, my husband took a look at the mole on my back, which had been bothering me for a while. He confirmed what I’d begun to suspect and we decided it needed checking out.

Tuesday had been an utterly awful day. I’d woken at 5.30 and, unable to get back to sleep, dragged myself to the gym before work. I’d then gone in, taken two classes, dealt with an IT upgrade, grabbed 10 minutes for a sandwich while children were knocking at the door arriving early for a lunchtime library club. The club turned out (a) to be for twice as many children as I’d been expecting and (b) minus a work colleague who couldn’t make it because she was covering for sickness elsewhere.

I am still struggling to find my feet with this KS2 group and although they seemed to enjoy themselves, I felt the session was muddled and chaotic. I also realised that all my fond hopes of following the Chatterbox guidelines were undermined by the fact that none of them were reading the books they had borrowed. The session lasted half an hour and I hadn’t managed to get them out of the room, let alone tidy up, when a Y1 class were waiting to come in. I hadn’t cleared up after them when the next class arrived, then two more – over 100 children in two hours. And then a KS1 group after school.

I went home, collapsed and foolishly opened my work email, which I hadn’t had time to look at. One message was a polite but nevertheless ill-timed complaint from a parent at another school that the library hadn’t been staffed when she’d arrived at 16.20 the day before to change her child’s book.

I’m responsible for three schools and I don’t think many people realise that I’ve had no professional training whatsoever. Officially I work 16.5 hours a week, in reality it’s 35 at least, plus planning and prep at home. So technically for at least half the week, I’m one of those increasingly sought-after people, the multi-site volunteer. Much of my stress is self-inflicted. Nobody asks me to do as much as I do, nobody quite realises how much it is. And, knowing I’m surrounded by equally pressurised people, I don’t like to mention it when I feel I’m going under. Yet I know I am.

By 3.00 next morning I was lying awake again, convincing myself that dying of skin cancer would at least save me experiencing the nuclear Armageddon that Trump was about to unleash. And worrying that I couldn’t sleep. By 8.00 I was back in work, meeting with a literacy co-ordinator who was so busy we could only meet in her classroom while she carried on sticking work in exercise books. I think it’s fair to say that neither of us really felt we could admit how much were were secretly dreading World Book Day.

I eventually made an appointment to have the mole checked out, but in my exhaustion I muddled up the time and when I got to the Medical Centre nobody would see me because I was 10 minutes late. Mea culpa.

Yes, it’s my fault I screwed up. My fault I’m stressed out. But it’s hard to see what alternative I have. I like my job. I’m surrounded by really great, supportive people. I find it incredibly hard to say no, because I know I make a difference. But I’m 57, and I’m beginning to feel that this is a young person’s game.

I subscribe to about 200 Twitter feeds, divided between current affairs (go to a demo, the world is ending, Be VERY AFRAID) and children’s lit/librarianship (Read this amazing book NOW, look at our wonderful reading wall, check out this school library that we made over to look like Hogwarts). I need to go cold turkey on both types for a while, and probably stop listening to the news as well. Then at least I’ll be able to see the funny side when a child says, “Miss, this book’s got a swear word in it,” and it turns out to be a Dick King Smith, and the word he thinks he’s so clever to have spotted is actually Dick.

Meanwhile, my daughter is applying for a PGCE course. Good luck to her. She’ll need it.